Shaving your head is a monumental moment for any bald guy, and I encourage you to join the club. If you aren’t comfortable with shaving, try buzzing it down to a zero. Plenty of dudes rock the zero buzz look while they’re bald/balding, and it’s a good look if done correctly. If you’re going bald, you’ll probably be pleasantly surprised. You actually look good with a buzzed head! Go ahead, start shaving your head.
Start Shaving Your Head Dude, It’s Fantastic
1. You’ll get really cold
Yeah, you never really would’ve thought it before – but when you start shaving your head, you lose an added layer of insulation between your skull and the outside world. Ever hear the saying “you lose 90% of your heat from your head”? Well, I don’t know if it’s entirely true – but I can attest to the fact that it gets really cold. You’ll want to buy a hat if you go out in winter, definitely, but don’t get too comfortable with it as a way of hiding your baldness. Rock that head, brother!
2. You’ll rub your head a lot
Before I shaved my head, I never really touched my hair unless I had an itch or something. Nowadays, I’ll just randomly start rubbing my own head because it feels good. Girls will do it too, it’s nice.
3. You’ll regularly make eye contact with guys who are balding but haven’t shaved their head yet
I think I can explain this phenomenon. Guys that are going bald fear their fate, so they look to other guys that have already accepted their baldness to see how they’re doing. It’s natural, understandable, and you’ll probably notice it when you start shaving your head. If you haven’t shaved your head yet, I can only assume that you probably have a keen eye for bald dudes. Start shaving your head already! The weather is warm on the other side.
4. You have an unspoken pact with other bald dudes
It’s kind of silly, really, but if you’re bald – you have been through it. You understand what the other guy has probably been through. It’s not like bald guys walk around giving each other high fives, but they definitely will give each other the benefit of the doubt more often than not. As Larry David once insinuated, bald guys are their own race. We look out for each other.
5. No matter what, “If we were in this movie, you would be (insert name of only bald guy in movie)”
Yeah, ever watch a movie or show with your friends and discuss which character you guys would be if you were in the show? Game of Thrones? You’re Lord Varys. Batman? You’re Lex Luthor. See what I’m saying? Being bald is a category we get placed in, even if we’re nothing like the bald dude in question.
6. If anybody sees your shampoo, they will be confused why you have shampoo.
I still use shampoo even though I shave my head. I don’t know if it’s completely necessary, I just kind of do it because I like to and it feels nice and clean afterwards. Is that so insane?
7. If you ever piss somebody off, they will always mention that you’re bald.
Every. Single. Time. “Bald asshole!”
8. You’ll feel like a badass
I don’t know why, but for whatever reason bald guys are perceived to be more dominant, better leaders, and tougher. We also supposedly look taller, which I think is actually true – there have been two occasions in my life where people I knew pre-shaved asked if I got taller. In the movies, almost all bald characters are the evil, tough guy – which is kind of cool. When you’re balding, it doesn’t look very good – but once you start shaving your head, the contrast is huge. You go from balding to badass in a matter of minutes.